1. Realize that I have to see my accountant and organize my 2008 taxes.
2. Instantly panic.
3. Ask myself as I do every year why I don’t stay on top on my receipts and expenses throughout the year so that the process is less involved and painful.
4. Brew a pot of coffee.
5. Start frenzied search for receipts and papers hidden in various pockets of living quarters.
6. Discover crumpled receipts stuffed in shoe boxes, envelopes,wallet, cracker boxes, make up bags.
7. Vow I will not be this disorganized next year.
8. Gaze longingly out window. Feel grateful that at least it is gloomy outside. Decide this is a good example of pathetic fallacy.
9. Look up definition of pathetic fallacy.
10. Panic about my future and lack of savings, organizational and budgeting skills.
11. Guzzle pot of coffee.
12. Decide I will put myself on a strict grocery budget.
13. Read the Maclean’s article about a foodie who fed himself and his partner for $50 a week, extolling the virtues of picking marrow out of bones. Feel repulsed by image of picking marrow out of bones.
14. Decide The Sweetie and I can only afford to eat cabbage from now on.
15. Surf the net for cabbage recipes.
16. Try to sort through receipts again.
17. Feel anxious and jittery. Blame the coffee.
18. Brew pot of tea.
19. Declare that next year everything will be different and I will have a good organizing system in place.
20. Decide the key to organization would be cute storage boxes.
21. Talk myself out of the cute storage boxes since part of my organization should involve getting rid of stuff, not accumulating more.
22. Call girlfriend to complain about my taxes and my need to de-clutter and budget.
23. Girlfriend reveals her fear that her girlfriends will be eating cat food in their retirement. Tells me I need a financial smackdown.
24. Vow to myself and the universe that I will change.
25. Find unclaimed receipts from 2006 at bottom of cracker box.
26. Get distracted by other piles of random things I have torn from magazines over the years. Read up on sculpting my arms in four weeks and how to make a scarf from old sweaters. Make plans to do both this month.
27. Decide I will not buy a single frivolous thing for the entire month of April.
28. Remember that the One of a Kind Craft Show is coming up in April. Rethink the whole no frivolous purchases plan.
29. Call girlfriend back. Tell her I am not ready for the financial smackdwon just yet.
30. Look at pile of receipts again.
31. Eat bowl of ice cream and frozen Laura Secord Easter cream egg I found in back of freezer.
32. Call accountant. Tell her I need another week to get organized.

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