I am constantly getting emails for all kinds of coupon deals and I never have the heart to unsubscribe. They give me the illusion of popularity when I see that I have fifteen new messages in my inbox. Never mind that they are usually for discount dinners and cheap laser hair removal. I love a deal and have often succumbed to these temptations although they have at times led me to sketchy massage establishments and mani pedi places that look like toenail fungi labs.
Today’s discounted offering was for Double Layer Jeans built to keep a girl warm yet stylish for a mere $29. The biting cold is setting in, the house has zero insulation and it feels like I am living in a meat packing plant. The Double Layer Jeans promise to “accentuate the shape of my legs” while keeping me warm and cozy. I have my suspicions. How do these denim purveyors know that I want to accentuate my legs that at best resemble two generous loaves of challah bread.
These days, I am struggling to pull up my single layer jeans, breaking a sweat despite the frigid temperatures in my drafty bedroom. I am finding my own method for dealing with the cold. I am self medicating with a lot of carbs. There’s a winter double layer for you.